Sometimes, Darling, a woman needs to nail her colors to the mast and say: this is what I stand for.

words – Merriam-Webster

drinks – Little’s Coffee, Diet Coke, any well-made Bellini or champagne cocktail

food – Fortnum and Mason, any well-made, canonical afternoon tea (if you put chocolate chips in the scones I will slap you)

beauty/ self-care – Lush, Dr. Bronner’s, Fresh

cars – old Land Rovers (but would you fix the electrical problems and Lord in His Mercy that Range Rover Evoque is an assault on all good sense from the name [ghastly] to the shape [that back-end, ghastly ghastly])

stationary/ pens – Crane, Smythson, Peter Pauper Press, Cavallini Papers & Co., Caspari, Waterman

          subscription boxes – TheraBox and Allure, how much they have helped in times of lock-downs and getting to a store is impossible or fraught! Such treats arriving month after month and if you are wondering, “but what if I don’t like something,” then you must remember Spamalot, the scene where Patsy is singing “Always look on the bright side of lift,” and then:

An old crone has just entered with a shrubbery on a cart.

Arthur: (spoken) Excuse me, it that a shrubbery?

Crone: (spoken) Oh yes, I’m throwing it out. The cat won’t leave it alone.

Arthur: (spoken) Well what a stroke of luck, I’ll take it off your hands.

You see, they are trying to cheer themselves up and someone comes along with just they thing they need, that coveted shrubbery.

That is how you think of subscription boxes: joyous delights delivered to your door, and whatever you don’t want – you hand over to someone who you think would like it. The benefit of knowing 12-15 year olds is that they are often thrilled with mud face-masks, spinach shower bombs, garlic lotion and white nail polish that you don’t want, not to mention the silk scarves, feather boas, satin slippers and rhinestone headbands you are trying to get rid of. Can you imagine the joy of a young teenager receiving tangerine lipstick, mint green eyeshadow, summer squash bath fizz and a daily affirmation coloring book? They are blissful and you are blissful with your new peach blusher, sparkling eyeliner, forsythia perfume and a candle that smells like wet wool.

Happiness as you wait to see what luxuries are coming this month, happiness as you open the box and spy your treasures, happiness as you divide the spoils and happiness as you apply shimmering cranberry body spray and chocolate-scented mascara. Darling you look fabulous! Happiness for everyone!