Yes, it’s still January, but February is on the march and we know what that means. No Valentine’s Day presents or Truly Hideous Valentines presents – hard to tell which is worse. Of course there is the happy Day of Joy (Feb. 15th, when chocolates go on sale) but in general February is a sort of let-down month. So all good divas must prepare.
Get that new white noise machine with the crashing waves/ Amazon jungle sounds. Maybe one of those ceiling projectors to splash stars all over your room or stick florescent stars on your ceiling. Candles are a must (battery operated on a 6 hr timer for IKEA if you don’t want to fuss). Unless you have perfume allergies, hie straight into a Lush store (or a Bath & Body Shop or Body Shop), spend a little on a new shower gel and a body spray.
February is not to be taken lightly – you need to be ready. Grey days and bad vibes are massing at the border like Russian mercenary troops. Secure your defenses and get a few tanks, so to speak.
Snacks. You are going to need snacks – a little something-something to get you through. Pretty much anything Cadbury or Sahale, not to mention Viennese Whirls, Eccles cakes, Guinness Crisps, scones and raspberry panna cotta. Hit F & M if you can (yes, the women at the chocolate counter are super grouchy, but have a glass of prosecco before you deal with them and you will be fine).
NO, Darling, don’t buy granola bars. It’s February. IT’S BLEAK out there. Have a mendiant. Or 6. Sugared almonds (dragée) are perfect, especially if they spiced with cinnamon.
YES, you need a new top in a pretty, pretending-I-am-on-vacation hue such as coral or turquoise.
NO, do not have any kind of ‘heart-to-heart’ talk with any entity, including loved ones, your landlord, anyone at work or your hairdresser. February is about silence – this is not the time to discuss anything. If you didn’t get it sorted in November, you need to wait for spring. “How do you see our relationship going?” is a question for April at the earliest.
YES, go to the dentist and do doctor’s appointments and set yourself up for success by having rewards (new, trashy fiction!) for when you finish drudgery like looking for a new job or sorting out a closet.
NO to wilderness adventures – February is tricky, it’s the sort of month in which you would see a grizzly and walk over to pet it instead of fleeing for your life; you would try to dance with wolves and head-butt a buffalo. Your internal danger-monitor is out of whack. You will jump off the ship thinking those fast shadows in the water are dolphins, and they are actually sharks. Stick close to shore and populated areas.
YES, on the spa (but no radical haircuts!), hunting for new cafe, growing herbs on a windowsill
Best of luck Darling!
What You Need to Eat Right Now: A Mendiant (or a Florentine)